An e-mail Carson sent me today:
This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this: What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life? Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer thesequestions:
If: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26. Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98% and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96% But
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100% and
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
Look how far ass kissing will take you:
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it is the Bullshit and Asskissing that will put you over the top.
This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint...it goes like this: What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life? Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer thesequestions:
If: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26. Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98% and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96% But
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100% and
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
Look how far ass kissing will take you:
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it is the Bullshit and Asskissing that will put you over the top.

4 Comments:
At 3:30 PM ,
Jacque said...
HA! That's true. Sad. But true.
At 4:32 PM ,
Serena said...
Sadly, I agree that a lot of workplaces are like that, but hopefully there are still some places where you get ahead on merit alone!
At 4:56 PM ,
Malin said...
Ditto (to both responses). :)
At 8:15 AM ,
Marie Wiens said...
Oh I believe so and so does Carson. But I thought the text was kind of funny!
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